"halloween" - It's just not our holiday

Last year, I blogged about halloween too and had a strong view against it and I still do. So before reading on, here's the post from last halloween. "And WHAT occasion is THIS?"

My feelings of halloween has been from a parenting spiritual battle point of view and there are several different views of halloween from the ministry angle here at the seminary. I totally understand the alternate festivals to halloween and believe there are some who are called to reach out during the events. There's "harvest festival", "cow town", "trunk or treat" etc etc. I still don't get why kids are allowed tons of candies but I can see the whole building relationships during these events and having an alternative for believers who want to have fun but without the gory side of it. So, in short, I don't condemn believers who celebrate it because we all have different convictions, backgrounds and cultures.

I was a little bothered on halloween this year because the ones who chose not to celebrate halloween were labeled the "legalistic". I felt bad so I talked to an older and trusted friend to see if they did it too. Cuz if they did, I think I'd really feel bad about not "participating" in the ministry side of it all. But guess what, they don't!!!! They had handed out candy and tracts one year, but they've been in Arizona where they were exposed to what halloween was all about and so they know it's a spiritual battle. I am so glad I got to talk to my good friend. And I love gathering reasons for not celebrating halloween, this year, I get to add a quote.  

"We don't celebrate halloween the same reason we don't celebrate Hanukkah. It's just not our holiday!" - Gayle Veitenheimer

God continuing to grow us and set us apart from this world. Help us to love one another and to win souls for Your kingdom. AMEN.

November - Adoption Awareness Month!

Help care for orphans

Lord guide us to the child you have already chosen for us to take into our home. Prepare us to love this child as our own. We will trust you in this process. AMEN.

"Adoption is the new pregnant!" - Sharon

Those who have imperfect wives love more than those who have perfect wives

I deeply believe God gave me Phill to remind me of His love and grace daily. Phill is not a perfect husband at all yet I have been amazed by his persistent love and grace towards me. I knew he loved me, but I am discovering more than ever the ways he loves me, as if I had only known the "tip of the iceberg" before we were married. The more grace Phill pours out on me, and the more love he gives me, the more I want to give back to him.

Just yesterday, I looked at myself (I literally imagined to be someone else looking at myself) and thought, "Man, I am a big mess. I have a terrible attitude, I am rude, I am mean, I am stubborn, and I am disorganzied." Then, just before I got fearful, depressed, and discouraged, my husband came to my mind. "Well, if I am such a big mess, Phill should have yelled at me, tried to divorce me, mocked me or something a while ago now... but I have never ever heard anything but affirmation, praises, and love from him...." And that's when this dawned on me. Those who have imperfect wives love more than those who have perfect wives! Phill loves me with a supernatural love that never dies!

On the day we first agreed to court each other towards marriage, he said to me, (and this is in front of a Dairy Queen in Miami) I promise to show you more of God in this relationship. My heart melted like ice cream and I wanted to marry this man knowing that I was willing to submit to him just as he had submitted himself to Christ. The more imperfect I am, the more I know he loves me. For when I fall short in being a mommy, a wife, a follower of Christ, or a friend, he is always here to pray with me and for me, love me, speak life unto me, encourage me, make me laugh, and hear me cry. Not that I will fall short more just to get more of his love, but that I will also love him back. The way Phill loves me, makes me want to love him more, pray for him more, love his children more, take care of this home more, and be a more Christ centered wife each day! I want to trust him, submit to him, serve him, and yet challenge him, stretch him, and "intense fellowship" (fight with a point) with him.

"There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. We love because [God] first loved us." 1John4:18-19

Heavenly Father, You are the perfect love that drives us to love each other with sacrifice, selflessness, affirmation, and till eternity. Continue to pour Your love into us so we may overflow and in turn pour Your love to everyone around us. I pray that You will continue to mature us in our faith, teach us to season our words with grace and sprinkle them with love, and have mercy on our children and children's children. Help us to be Christ centered spouses, parents, and friends. AMEN.

Hosanna in the highest

Break my heart for what breaks Yours, everything I am for Your kingdom's cause......

Seek ye first the Kingdom of God

Matthew 3: 31-34 So don't worry, saying, 'What will we eat?' or 'What will we drink?' or 'What will we wear?' For the idolaters eagerly seek all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be provided for you. Therefore don't worry about tomorrow, because tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

God renew my patience and my soul. Pour Your love in me so I may do so for my children, husband and others. I need Your help to raise the children. I need Your grace for I am not perfect at all. Lead me in Your peaceful path. Bless me with Your wisdom and Your words. Help me focus on seeking You and Your Kingdom and not mine. I lay down myself and desire to drink up Your living water. You are my rock and my salvation. Teach me to rest in You and give You my burdens. Continue to work in me and make me holy. Set me apart for Your works. AMEN.

I GOT JESUS, BABY!

new world order = globalization = end times???

I don't completely agree with everything in this video but I know it bears lots of truth to it. Ephesians 6 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.

Lord, help us to put on the full Armor of God so we can stand against the Devil's schemes. Deliver us as you delivered Daniel from the den of lions. Direct us and give us peace. Equip and train us so we can in turn equip our children and train them in Your word and truth. AMEN.

lazy

i love journaling but right now i'm lazy and preferring to just type. i'm trying to improve in leading worship for the pre teens... notes from last night:

1. pray like a 5th grade boy
2. mind the flow of the whole set eg fast fast slow prayer vs fast prayer fast talk slow prayer
3. know the structure of all songs verse chorus verse chorus chorus instr bridge chorus etc
4. write down what to pray or say
5. crack the whip and start on time no chit chatting
6. don't worry too much about instr details when players are good
7. start sound checking right away to get everyone into practice mode
8. send song keys with the song list
9. think of something funny that'll break the ice
10. don't pray with long pauses or pray too long kids start elbowing each other
11. energetic prayers during the intro of songs not just at the beginning or end with solemn prayers
12. have fun
13. know my lyrics
14. ask drummer to click it off
15. feed off of the kids' energy
16. ask band to vamp while kids come in from game time
17. ask kids to do motions at front if songs are familiar
18. develop my own leading style

God help me.

Oath of allegiance

You would've thought I'd blog on becoming a citizen last Thursday. LOL Well, I am an American citizen now. woohoo! I first drove all the way from the seminary to Irving, thinking that the ceremony was there. Then when I got all 3 kids down to the building and checking the diaper bag through security, an officer came up to me and said, "Ma'am, it is not here." "You are KIDDING me!" So I looked on the paper, and realized it was in a court house in downtown Fort Worth. Wow. I wasn't mad, I had a peace and calmness about it that only God could explain. I buckled all 3 kids back into the car, drove down to dowtown Fort Worth and tried to park. Parking was expensive and guess what? I did not bring my wallet. HA. HA. Well, I drove around till I found a meter and I prayed and prayed that it was one with leftover minutes in it. Lo and behold, the Lord provides 39 minutes on the meter! So, I used the 2 dimes and a nickel that I found on the carpet in my car and prayed that the ceremony will not be longer than an hour. My kids must have thought I was losing my mind watching me mumbling these prayers.

As we went into the court house, I explained to the officer at the front that I went to Irving. Without another word, he said, "go upstairs to the 4th floor and look for Maria." "okay... thanks" "don't dwadle, you don't have much time. go go go!" So with 3 children under the age of 4, we went to the 4th floor. Well, it was real quiet and real solemn. There were people outside the courthouse waiting for the people who were in the ceremony. So I started asking everyone where Maria is. No one knew. I prayed again. Suddenly the door opens, and out comes Maria. NO KIDDING! "MARIA, MARIA!" She was very surprised and said to go with her. As she opened the door, she asked, "You didn't bring anyone with you?" I shook my head. "Do you have to bring your kids?" "Well, Yes! I am not leaving them outside" So with thousands of apologies, I walked through the court house where people had to move their chairs and legs out of the way for my kids and stroller. Finally, I reached the immigration officers who just checked me in and asked me to sit... There was no room. So, one of the officers stood up and orchestrated for a whole row of strangers to move down one seat. That was my most most most embarrassing moment of my life. We waited and waited for the judge to come out. Someone sang the star spangled banner and then all 63 countries represented were mentioned, ranging from Iran to Vietnam. Then we got to the oath of allegiance. This is the part where I thought was interesting. The oath really reminded me of a covenant I made with the Lord my God when I first surrended my life to Him! Read this:

I hereby declare, on oath, that I absolutely and entirely renounce and abjure all allegiance and fidelity to any foreign prince, potentate, state, or sovereignty of whom or which I have heretofore been a subject or citizen; that I will support and defend the Constitution and laws of the United States of America against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; that I will bear arms on behalf of the United States when required by the law; that I will perform noncombatant service in the Armed Forces of the United States when required by the law; that I will perform work of national importance under civilian direction when required by the law; and that I take this obligation freely without any mental reservation or purpose of evasion; so help me God.

When we declare our faith in Christ, we renounce our allegiance to the world, Satan and our sinful nature. That we will read His word, support and defend the Truth which is in Christ Jesus. That we will put on the armor of God and stand firm against the Devil's schemes. Ephesians 6. That we quoting the oath, take the obligation freely without nay mental reservation or purpose of evasion, so help us Lord! We are to renounce our own lives and die to ourselves and gain new lives in Christ! When we "jump kingdoms", we must understand that we will no longer serve the Prince of the World but pledge our lives to the Prince of Peace.

Well anyway, then judge Bleil had to give the keynote address because there was no keynote speaker. He was so funny. He kept apologizing for America and speaking of the responsibilities of the judicial branch. That sometimes the executive and legislative branch tells the judicial branch to shut up and that's wrong because the judicial branch keeps the other branches in line. Then he went on to tell people to vote.

Then someone sang God bless America. I personally preferred God bless the USA but I'll take God bless America. Then we did the pledge of allegiance and that was it! I was glad we went to Irving because if we showed up at 9:30, I would not have had enough coins for 3 hours, and I would have been in terrible traffic, upset, stressed out and grouchy. And the kids would not have behaved so well at the courthouse. The Lord turned my carelessness into a huge blessing. The first thing I did to celebrate my new found citizenship was to fill out a form to register as a voter!!! =)

Lord thank You that I am a citizen in Heaven. That You have allowed me to become part of Your Kingdom. AMEN.

Who's your security blanket?

I have been mourning over certain sins in my life and learning to die to myself and gaining new life in Christ. Once in a while, I still get series of dreams of abandonment, insecurity, and heartache all over again. My sinful nature keeps going backwards, looking at life with a hindsight, and wanting to gain some kind of security through my past. During these times, I feel shame and guilt, and I always turn to my God, my godly friends, and my husband for help. I confess, I mourn, I repent, I forgive, I let go.... it is terribly difficult. I seek for wise counsel, I read and meditate upon His words, and I pray for His miraculous healing upon my soul. I asked Phill to tell me what to do today and he asked me to stop clinging onto my past as a security blanket. I felt terrible. At first, because I feel like I have betrayed him. As if I have not clung onto him as a security blanket. Then, I felt convicted, because it means I have not clung onto Christ as my security blanket either! Yes, this is going to be a long, hard road. But I know I have a God who will never leave me or forsake me, and I know I have a husband who continues to lay down his life for me daily. I will continue to die to myself and align my life with Christ who saved me from the darkness.

Lord, reveal your heart to me and pull me away from evil. Help me find security, identity, and sovereignty in You alone. AMEN.

"Propaganda is propaganda no matter how you paint it"... shame shame shame

God help us. Show your sovereignty and give us hope. Help us to guide people around us to find hope in You and You only. Use us to glorify Your name. Send us into the fields of harvest and teach us to be fishers of men. You alone are God and You will deliver these souls. AMEN

YouTube Evangelism part 2

Unexpected turn of events I believe. Pray pray pray for the person I have been reaching out to.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=78kGJCPYRkM&NR=1


"Hey everybody! we are going on vacation for the very first time as a family! do you what vacation is?" Abigail: "Yeah! The baaaad apple." "No!!! THat's temptation!!!" LOL!

NAPO

I have always been troubled about not being able to organize and decorate any space around me. I went online and typed in organization tips, and clicked on NAPO, National Association of Professional Organizers!!! You can apparently pay someone who is certified through this association about 50 dollars an hour to come to your house and help you organize your house. I think I should just read tips and learn how to do it myself. So, the journey has begun. I have been getting boxes and bins and just putting everything in them. Supposedly that's how it works. The next step is to learn how to decorate. Here are the "Ten comments in decorating your room".

http://www.rentaldecorating.com/Interiordesign101-7/interior_design_ten_commandments.htm

God, continue to help me in becoming a godly woman, wife, and mother who can pass down great skills and knowledge to the next generations. AMEN.

YouTube Evangelism

I love being on youtube. Not just because I get to watch movie clips, free comedy shows, bring up worship songs etc etc. But because I feel heart broken for those who comment on these sites! A lot of them are seeking for the truth and asking really good questions but seldom do they get the answers they need. Some are just there to debate and tear others' shakable faith down and that's not right. So, I've been at this for about 6 months now. I read the comments, find a target, pray pray pray for what and how to say, and give it a shot. It is simple. Shy Christians should definitely give it a try! Here's a recent example:

SHADOW10621 (3 months ago)

I didn't get this story when I was in bible school and I still don't get it 38 years later. What did God sacrifice if he could bring anything back ? I mean he sideth on the right hand of God the father almighty. I am bad I should not question things God knows everything and I am stupid.

ndyt (2 months ago)

SHADOW10621, yeah, I feel the same way. If Jesus came back and still lives, then what was sacrificed? Doesn't Jesus need to stay dead for it to be a sacrifice?

mommykoo (1 day ago)

He was dead. Jesus died for 3 days! The resurrection was important for He proved that one day He CAN in fact plead for our lives in front of the Father and get us in Heaven with Him. That's HUGE and glorious!

mommykoo (1 day ago)

Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. In my Father's house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. You know the way to the place where I am going. John 14:1-4

lepgray (3 weeks ago)

So the excrutiating pain and torture, the humiliation, the injustice, the betrayal by His own disciple and His own people, that's not sacrifice enough for you? He was completely and utterly deserted by His father and He didn't KNOW if He would be resurrected. He was sinless and He suffered anyway, so that each of us can take His gift and live eternally with Him. I have to say I'm pretty awe struck and deeply humbled. By the way, it's okay to question, just be open to His answer.

mommykoo (1 day ago)

The most awesome thing about God is that He wants you to ask the questions because then it means you are still seeking for the truth and have not given up.

Jesus did not have to die but because God wants His creation to be saved so one day we can still be with Him, Jesus had to die for our sins. He was resurrected to prove that He was indeed the Son of God and that He can one day fulfill His promise to bring us to Heaven.

mommykoo (1 day ago)

For the one whom God has sent speaks the words of God, for God gives the Spirit without limit. The Father loves the Son and has placed everything in his hands. Whoever believes in the Son has eternal life, but whoever rejects the Son will not see life, for God's wrath remains on him. John 3:34-36

TheThechosen0ne (2 months ago)

wat happen about the earthquake

mommykoo (1 day ago)

And when Jesus had cried out again in a loud voice, he gave up his spirit.

At that moment the curtain of the temple was torn in two from top to bottom. The earth shook and the rocks split. The tombs broke open and the bodies of many holy people who had died were raised to life. They came out of the tombs, and after Jesus' resurrection they went into the holy city and appeared to many people. Matthew 27

mommykoo (1 day ago)

i think the earth shook to open the tombs. the sequence of events was not exactly 100%. also the sky was supposed to be dark.

mommykoo (1 day ago)

oh and there was no storm recorded

mommykoo (1 day ago)

nevertheless, it's a great video.

ndyt (1 day ago)

mommykoo, your religion is a based on a fairytale and its practice is a cult.

mommykoo (1 day ago)

what if you are wrong?

ndyt (1 day ago)

mommykoo, if am wrong then my chance of getting into heaven is the same about the same as yours because there are thousands of religions out there so the chance of picking the right one is small. There are over 38,000 different denominations of christianity alone! Those are long odds to get it right. Also, I feel I have not done anything to warrant being tortured for eternity. Have you? What was it you did?

mommykoo (21 hours ago)

Those were bible verses just in case you'd give Him a chance and read it thoroughly.

But look, easy example. If I handed you a cup of water with a teaspoon of poison in there, would you take it? I wouldn't, because it's not pure. Well, God is light, and in Him there is no darkness. Just as water and poison wouldn't go together and light and darkness wouldn't either, neither do sinful people and God. That answers the question whether we have ever done anything to deserve hell.

ndyt (21 hours ago)

mommykoo, so you are saying that even though god is all powerful, he he accepts someone that is not pure good then he will become tainted and no longer pure good? If that is the case then he is not all powerful.

mommykoo (21 hours ago)

I have read richard dawkins' books. he tells me that i am an organic meatbag while my Creator tells me He had made a way for us to be in heaven with Him one day. All He ever did was love me.

ndyt (20 hours ago)

mommykoo, too bad your creator is a fairytale.

mommykoo (20 hours ago)

I have nothing to lose. He'll be my knight in shining armor and I will be His bride.

What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, yet forfeit his soul? Or what can a man give in exchange for his soul? If anyone is ashamed of me and my words in this adulterous and sinful generation, the Son of Man will be ashamed of him when he comes in his Father's glory with the holy angels. Mark 8:36-38

ndyt (11 hours ago)

mommykoo, how do you know you have the right religion and the right denomination? There are thousands.

mommykoo (4 hours ago)

religion and denomination are man made. all i know if my God is the living God that made me and that He provided a way for me to be with Him in the end of time. I know i am covered for eternity.

ndyt (2 hours ago)

mommykoo, the bible is man made too. It was constructed by the catholic church to control people. You have nothing that isn't man made to tell you about god.

mommykoo (1 minute ago)

you're incorrect. the whole world was created by God. He created the sun and the moon, He set the stars in the sky and rainbow in clouds. He created the trees and the fish, the birds and the beasts. He created the ants and the dirt. Cont......

mommykoo (1 minute ago)

He also created my conscience and made me in His image so when I do wrong, I feel guilt and shame. even if the bible was man made, the words were inspired by God. His words convicts a soul to fear death and desire Heaven. Nothing wrong w/ being in a better place after a person dies. is there?

mommykoo (3 seconds ago)

everything that He has made is more than enough evidence for my eyes.

mommykoo (21 hours ago)

JEsus said, "I am the way the truth and the life, no one comes to the Father except through me." John 14:6

mommykoo (21 hours ago)

John 3:34-36

mommykoo (21 hours ago)

I think the more valid question is, why do you think you deserve to be in Heaven? Let's go down the list of 10 commandments. 1. Worship God only. Have you loved something more than God? 3. don't misuse His name. Have you ever said OMG? 5. Honor your parents. Have you ever disobeyed them? 9. Do not lie. Have you ever tweaked the truth?

ndyt (21 hours ago)

mommykoo, no, the more important question is: why do you think the god of the bible is real when there is only evidence agaisnt it and none for it?

mommykoo (21 hours ago)

what evidence do you have against a living God? I'd like to know. and i think you are avoiding my valid question of why you think you deserve to be in Heaven with a Holy God.

ndyt (21 hours ago)

The earthquake would be in roman records, it is not.

mommykoo (15 minutes ago)

i think you are saying that to take people's hearts away from God. why? why don't you want others to reconcile with their Creator? it's one thing if you don't believe and it's another to bring others with you... =(

Lord, continue to use us for Your glory and to become more efficient fishers of men. AMEN.

My hubby

I just wanted to take note here on my blog that Phill has stepped up like never before to lead this family spiritually! We have always done the basics just to get by. Like the before bed bible time, prayers at each meal and bed time, bible verse each week... real basic. For the past few days, Phill has added a simple devotion at dinner time too! He's been more patient, kind, and gentle lately. And I am not supposed to have found out, but he has been doing the love dare!!! (I found out on day 4, hehehe) I have just been so amazed, surprised and flattered that my husband has been making such huge efforts to love me and our children. God is so faithful and full of grace.

God, thank You for Your faithfulness. We marvel at Your plans. Continue Your work in us. Continue to mold us and transform us. Help me to be Phill's helper. To uplift him and to love him. Help me to be a Christ centered wife and mother. I will continue to surrender to You every morning. Your will be done. AMEN.

(Oh, and Esther crawled two steps this morning.)
Coming back from the pool, ABigail asked, "mommy can I go play with my friends?" "I thought you were hungry. Don't you wanna come inside to eat?" "ummm, you can go inside to cook and I can play outside!!!" LOL!!!

Senator Cornyn's reply

Dear Mrs. Koo:

Thank you for contacting me about President Obama’s new initiative to monitor American citizens’ speech about his health care policies. I appreciate having the benefit of your comments on this matter.

As you know, on August 5, 2009, I sent a letter to President Barack Obama expressing my concerns about a new program that requested American citizens to forward to the White House emails and “casual conversations” of their fellow citizens who oppose the President’s health care policies. As I stated in my letter to the President, I believe that this program is inconsistent with America’s tradition of free speech and public discourse. I urged the President to cease the program, to purge personally identifiable information gathered by the program from White House records, and to detail how the White House intended to use the information gathered.

Though I am still awaiting a response to my letter from the President, I was pleased to see that on August 17, 2009, the White House shut down the program. While I am glad the site has been shut down, Americans still deserve to know what the White House intends to do with information that was collected during the 13 days the program was in effect. On August 19, 2009, I sent another letter to the President, reiterating my belief that the White House should fully disclose how they are using this information, and seeking the President’s commitment that no similar programs will be instituted in the future.

Health care affects every American and I believe we need to take the time to listen to the patients, providers, families, and small businesses that will be significantly impacted by reform. As Congress debates health care reform and other critical policy matters, citizen engagement must not be chilled by fear of government monitoring the exercise of free speech rights.

I appreciate the opportunity to represent Texans in the United States Senate, and you may be certain that I will continue working with my colleagues to protect our First Amendment rights. Thank you for taking the time to contact me.

Sincerely,

JOHN CORNYN
United States Senator


517 Hart Senate Office Building
Washington, DC 20510
Tel: (202) 224-2934
Fax: (202) 228-2856
http://www.cornyn.senate.gov

GOD I PRAY FOR SENATOR CORNYN AS HE MAKES DECISIONS FOR US EACH DAY. WE PRAY THAT YOUR WISDOM AND SOVEREIGNTY WILL RULE AND THAT YOU WILL BE IN EVERYTHING AND EVERY DECISION HE MAKES. I ALSO PRAY FOR OUR NATION. FORGIVE US OF OUR SINS AGAINST YOU. MAKE US SET APART. HELP US MOVE FORWARD. YOU ARE SOVEREIGN AND WE TRUST IN YOU. GUIDE US WITH YOUR WORDS AND WE PRAY FOR OUR LEADERS TO MAKE DECISIONS THAT WILL HONOR YOU AND YOUR WORD. AMEN

This is hilarious. Must watch!

Lord where are my eagles' wings? Need it now.

I just need a break from spiritual warfare. I am getting so tired of the Enemy have strongholds in my family tree.


Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Romans 9-12


I need lots of prayer and lots of thinking and lots of wisdom and lots of love because I plainly do not know how to deal with this situation. GOd help. I am claiming victory because You have already won. I am asking so I may receive. Give me the right attitude, words, whatever I need to deal with my mom. I am tired. Renew my strength. Continue Your work in me and my family so we may glorify Your name. AMEN.

Abandonment

I grew up in Hong Kong. Nothing too special about it. I was surrounded by buddhist temples, hinduist idols, atheistic beliefs, and lots of incense (not to mention pollution). I was taught to love my friends but gossip about them behind their backs. Also to respect my elders but lie to my teachers. Then to spend tens of thousands of dollars to worship my ancestors but shun the poor in the streets and old in the family.

Now, I might just be the only one who was raised that way in Hong Kong, but nevertheless, that was what I learned. I was sensitive, quiet, and confused growing up, and by preteen, I was rebellious, calloused, and even more confused. When I became a follower of Christ, I studied my bible, prayed to Jesus, and worshiped Him with total abandonment. I didn't mind anything that He would call me to be or to do. I wanted Him to completely take over. My mother saw God's work in me and decided never to worship her gods again. My oldest sister saw my spiritual growth, praised God and joined in the race. My brother accepted Christ too even though he's mentally handicapped.

I have followed Christ for 6 years to date. I have married a godly husband who is a Jesus freak, have 3 children whom we have devoted unto Him, and no, I have not been perfect, I have needed a lot of grace and mercy, and Christ is still central to our family and my being.

Just a few weeks ago, my oldest sister and her 2 young children traveled once again from CA to FL to stay at my parents house. My mother, who had "accepted Christ", still kept her idols in the house. I encouraged my sister, if she stayed there with her kids, that even if she didn't 't break them and throw them away, she needed to at least say something about them. Being first born, she's not the type to ruffle feathers, break traditions, and break idols. So, she taped the idols up and put them in a box. Supposedly, my mother didn't even notice until my brother told her, and she started crying. She was going to find the box when they leave. Well, yesterday just after their plane left DFW for a plane transfer, my mother called her and told her not to call her ever again because she can't find the box. I encouraged her, quoting from Galatians 1.  And today, my sister texted me telling me that "grace was sufficient" so we shouldn't play policeman. Whatever that meant. But then, she started telling me that mom doesn't want to be Christian because of me.

Okay, this is where I am at right now. Do I take this as a compliment or do I sob over it? In Luke 14:25-27, I am fully aware, that there is a huge price in following Christ. In Matthew 5, the BeAttitudes, I am going to align my life to the Word of God, even if my family does not understand and completely disagree with us being in ministry, in seminary, and in Christ. I cannot become less than I am called to be just because I want to be liked by every one. At least my mother knows what a follower of Christ is like. That we surrender everything to Him and has no reservation. That we choose to please God than please man. I have to be okay with my cousins not talking to me or friending me on facebook. I have to be okay with my mother cursing me in front of people. I have to be okay with my college friends calling me freak and other names. I have to be okay with complete brokenness resulting in me falling prostrate in front of Jesus' feet asking for His mercy, grace, and love. But I sob over the fact that my mother was not saved after all. I am heart broken for all those who are not saved especially relatives that I grew up knowing. I am desperately grieved. God hear my prayers to You. Hear my cry and my heart. I choose to surrender to You and give You my all. Save my family, my children, my grand children, and my great grand children. Let us live a life of total abandonment. I know Your grace is sufficient for me. I don't need anyone else's approval or anyone else's praise. I ask You to give me Your wisdom and Your words, Your compassion and Your heart. Help me to be a beacon of light to especially my children. Help me to get organized at the home and become a woman of God that will glorify You. Help me to see the strengths and weaknesses of my children and teach them to honor You with their gifts. I thank You for Your love and Your grace. You are my strength and my shield. AMEN.

Important video for all to watch - carseats

I pledge allegiance

Tomorrow morning, I am going to the department of homeland security to take the citizenship tests and interview. I guess it's time I become a citizen. My passport from Hong Kong has been expired for 2 years now and my resident alien status is expiring in 2011. I was on their website and saw that they need volunteers at the Naturalization ceremonies. LOL!! Like singers, choirs, keynote speakers, and color guards!!

https://egov.uscis.gov/crisgwi/go?action=offices.detail&office=DAL&OfficeLocator.office_type=LO&OfficeLocator.statecode=TX

No joke. I am gonna sign up to sing or give a keynote address or something. LOL.

On a more serious note, the Koo family is still struggling to become a discipled family. As a first generation Christian couple, Phill and I have so much to work on. We are in desperate need of God's grace on the children all the time. Every time I mess up or my husband mess up, I find myself going, "Oh Lord, help. Have mercy on us and our children." So, Phill and I are looking for an older and experienced Christian couple to take us under their wings so we can learn what a Christ centered family looks like. God give us an idea of the couple that you are going to provide for us. We need so much help and grace! Please give us a couple that will guide us, love us, and pray for us during these tough years of parenting. Provide for us what we need in order to become a more Christ centered family. Continue to transform Phill and I so that we may show more of You and less of us as we love, teach, disciple, and guide our children. AMEN.

In this present age

Yes 2009 is the year Obama tripled our national debt, legalized tax payers' money for abortion, and of course, attempting to socialize health care.

http://www.facebook.com/ext/share.php?sid=119316071620&h=tjcGM&u=V_FNu&ref=nf

http://www.youtube.com/my_subscriptions?pi=0&ps=20&sf=added&sa=0&sq=obamacare&dm=2&s=C0hFlT7rcz4&as=1#

http://fota.cdnetworks.net/pdfs/2009-07-30-healthcare-concerns-questions.pdf

Enough said.

Today was also the day we and the inlaws reconciled. I am supposed to have some kind of spiritual freedom now... Is it going to come slowly? Or is it going to hit me tomorrow or sth? I don't know..... But long story short, nothing from the past was brought up but new boundaries were set. I said I forgave her and asked her to forgive me. Our hands actually touched too... not just for like a second. It was kinda awkwardly long. Like 3 minutes. I don't know why I was clutching on it. In the middle of us talking, Phill decided to talk to another guy who was just walking through, asking him if there was coffee.......... ~.~

God continue to show me what to do and help me to obey You.

One of those days

I am just emotional today. The beginning of the month. I think I am PMS-ing. LOL.

Today, Abigail was coloring a dog and I asked her if the dog had a name. She thought for a moment and smiled saying, "Dog Koo." HAHAHAHAHA.......

I am mad. I am mad at God's people who are not broken hearted over the conditions of the nation. I am mad that lots of people still believe that politics has nothing to do with Christianity. Paul. Apostle Paul was always in the middle of politics!! He talked to officials, emperors, even the prison guards! Our war is not of the flesh but is in the spirit. Our political warfare is spiritual. So much at risk for our children and our children's children.

To be continued........................ gotta go cook.

Yawn

Lately Esther's been waking at wee hours to play. So... yawn....

I am sure we'll laugh at this one day, but it sure wasn't funny when I came downstairs from feeding Esther to finding Abigail and Isaac eating "beans" from a game. How did they not know that those were not real? When I saw Isaac kinda chewing on one, I asked him, hey buddy, don't eat those, they are not really beans, just toys. Abigail turned around with a shocked look and said, they are not real? I looked at her and said, of course not! It's a game! Did you eat them too??? She started to panic and said, yeah.... I ate 3!! I can't say I did not freak out. After 5 mins of screaming into an imaginary pillow, I calmly explained to her that the beans will probably just come out in her poop in a day or two. WOw....

Dad and Leo left today. I am glad they came. Leo had fun at joy zone on Sun and I think Dad's heart is more receptive to the gospel. I thought this visit was gonna be a little more stressful but it turned out fine. Now, the Lord has to work on my heart towards the inlaws who are coming in just 2 weeks. I will be sooooo grouchy for the next two weeks. I just don't know what to expect and not to expect. I am a little scared and a little reluctant still but I know God requires me to forgive. It is a long process and a conflict. I need to keep on forgiving.

God, keep transforming me and making me holy for Your glory. I pray my dad will seek You with his heart. I pray You will give him more opportunities to hear Your word and for him to seek Your face. Continue to use me for Your kingdom work. I pray wisdom over my children and my husband. I ask for more patience, love and encouraging words. And yes, help me to reconcile with my in laws. AMEn.

I love how Isaac says bana for banana

I know the Lord is with me. I posted yet another controversial article http://www.facebook.com/ext/share.php?sid=120021161816&h=w2m2Z&u=idwcV&ref=mf on facebook and comments came flooding. I guess my liberal friends don't like it when I do that. I knew it was a spiritual warfare so I prayed and prayed before I did anything else and my prayer was answered by a friend who posted 2 min before me. I didn't feel alone. I knew God is a miracle worker. I know He was able to show me and affirm me in my faith. He was so full of grace. God thank you for showing up. I can always count on You.

My heart was so grieved with my toddlers today. Abigail lied twice, disobeyed me about jumping across Esther, and ignored me when I asked her to come to me. Isaac... Oh Isaac, he spilled everything that was in his hands on purpose the whole day. He sprayed cleaners all over the video camera, he too ignored me when I asked him to come to me. He was a terror today. I was soooo discouraged. I asked people for prayers. I know this is an uphill thing. I have to fight for my kids' hearts and souls. I know that. God help. I know You are the only one able to do this. You are the One to call them to You. All I care is that they will know you and love you and obey you. Give us godly wisdom. Help us follow You. Help us capture their hearts for You. Give them a consuming passion to pursue You. Give me the patience and wisdom to deal with them when they fall short of You glory. Help me gently restore them into Your righteousness and Your love. I need Your help, affirmation and Your grace. AMEN.