One of dem "Paul"s

We all know that Paul was one of the baddest Jews around town. He wore the laws around him, kept the Shabbat holy, ate kosher food, was circumcised, and was most importantly persecuting anyone who claimed Jesus to be the Son of God. Paul beat them, burned them, hanged them, spat at them, scorned at them.

Then, BAM, he was changed. He became one of "them" followers of Christ because of an encounter on the road to Damascus. Paul was instantly transformed into a passionate martyr who gave his life to see others saved. Apparently, Paul was never a Peter or a John.

My point is, there's lots of people who were saved like a Peter or a John, and then there are people who were saved like a Paul. Of course, all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.

But like my husband, he is definitely a Peter. He accepted Christ when he was 6, had great friends and parents of his friends who held him accountable. And yes, a little rebellion and little mistakes here and there, but he stood up and followed Jesus after a long struggle.

Now, me, I am definitely one of dem Pauls. I grew up bowing before dead relatives, coughing at incense, laughing at Bible stories and intelligent design, and a terrible brat who would sell her life for security and love.

Then, BAM, I met Jesus, and I knew He was the One. I left everyone and everything behind. Even though I had only been a follower since 2003, my knowledge and faith was blasting all over the place. My husband thought I had been a Christian for a decade when he met me, which was 3 months into my Christian walk.

I had to go through all of those bad tough times for Jesus to get to me and I wish some things didn't have to happen. But I am glad I am one of dem Pauls, because my life is a miracle. Christ is glorified in me because He was the One who gave me a life that is meaningful, convicted, hard but filled with joy. My life was turned around and transformed in a way that Peters, Johns, families and friends will never fully understand. Jesus is as real as a lemon. He is never to be sold out on or ignored.

God I do pray, that if You allowed me to start out as one of dem Pauls, that You will also give me strength, perseverance, passion, determination and the grace to finish well as one of dem Pauls. Sustain me and walk with me. All glory to You. AMEN.

KING OF GLORY THIRD DAY

Who is this King of Glory that pursues me with his love

And haunts me with each hearing of His softly spoken words

My conscience, a reminder of forgiveness that I need

Who is this King of Glory who offers it to me

Who is this King of angels, O blessed Prince of Peace

Revealing things of Heaven and all its mysteries

My spirit's ever longing for His grace in which to stand

Who's this King of glory, Son of God and son of man

His name is Jesus, precious Jesus

The Lord Almighty, the King of my heart

The King of glory

Who is this King of Glory with strength and majesty

And wisdom beyond measure, the gracious King of kings

The Lord of Earth and Heaven, the Creator of all things

Who is this King of Glory, He's everything to me
The Lord of Earth and Heaven, the Creator of all things

He is the King of glory, He's everything to me

Wowzer

I thought I should at least blog once in August. Tonight, I led worship at Metochai! Kathy and I had fun. This calling to lead worship with music is getting clearer and clearer as we speak and still I doubt. I doubt my abilities mostly, and my availability, as in "You want me to do all this while we have 3 toddlers?"

When we left Miami, I had 3 friends. Becca, Phill and Jesus. I think I had given up trying to find people with my odd passions, hobbies and interests. God has shown me that I need to depend on only Him and what it is like to be an outcast. Most of my so called friends have deserted me and plainly rejected me. I have been called lots of things, and I am particularly proud about the one time I was called "narrow-minded" by a "good friend".

There is hope I believe. I think there might be some oddballs like me in Metochai afterall. I can't wait to know these sisters in Christ God have in store for me. Lord, you know I need healthy relationships. I pray for a mentor, and accountability partners; people who want to grow in Christ on their own and with me. You have the future in Your hands. I ask that You will be with our children and help them understand who You are. Help us to be the parents who will reflect Your image to them. Give me patience, wakefulness, and gentleness. I want You to come back not to deliver us from the mess here on earth but to show Your faithfulness that every knee shall bow and every tongue confess that You are Lord. AMEN.